Do it scared. In this life there are so many clubs that we join without want or desire. We are involuntarily thrown into this club based on tragedy or trauma. In a time of uncertainty it can feel like the walls are closing in and everyone you know is being assigned their club’s all access [...]
When A Friendship Abruptly Ends
In this life, one thing is certain. Loss. The past couple of years I’ve taken some pretty bad losses. I lost my stepdad, who was one of my biggest cheerleaders. Though his death was completely unexpected, I knew it was final and I could grieve and people would understand that grief comes with a loss [...]
People are losing it! Store mask policy causes man to expose himself.
Of course someone thought it was a good idea to pull their penis out in the middle of a department store - it's 2020. At this point I'd be less surprised if the man unzipped his pants and his pet crow flew out and perched on his shoulder. But let's take a look at what [...]
Transracial Adoption & Confronting My Own Biases
I walked into the lobby and pushed the arrow for the elevator. The metal doors slid open and a black man was standing inside. He had baggy pants on, dreads and a flat-billed baseball hat. Eyes wide, I quickly scanned the situation. Is he grabbing his waist band? Does he have drugs on him? What [...]
“I’m not black.”: An intimate look at blackness
My oldest son scrunched up his nose and said, “I’m not black.” I was immediately filled with anguish and dread. My worst fear was being realized. I have been having race conversations with both of my boys for as long as I can remember. Sometimes because I had to and sometimes just to have an [...]
These Hangings are Not Coincidence
Strange fruit has begun to bloom again. Isn’t it peculiar? I first heard the term strange fruit when I was a child, but I didn’t understand what it meant. I just knew it was a song that appeared to be solemn. It wasn’t until I was an adult and heard the song again that I [...]
Actionable Steps for White People After Sitting With Your Discomfort on Race
Pain. Anger. Grief. Fear. If you’re feeling heavy from these emotions right now, you are not alone. Our country is weighed down in mourning the innocent lives of Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, and George Floyd. But for the African American community, these are not new burdens to bear. The weight of these emotions have left [...]
My Son Said “I Can’t Breathe”
Hey friend, Do you remember me? It’s been a while, I know. I sat behind you in civics in junior high. Do you remember me? You were my base on the cheer squad, and once you caught my head just before it hit the ground after a long day of stunting. You don’t remember? Our [...]
One Day Normal Will Return
One day normal will return. When things go back to normal, the birds’ songs will sound a little sweeter. Hugs will feel a little tighter, and smiles will look a little warmer. When things go back to normal, visiting relatives will feel like a vacation. Tears of joy will come a little quicker and love will [...]
The Ugly Truth About COVID Co-Parenting
Alright friends, buckle up because I'm going to give this to you straight with no chaser (I've always wanted to say that). Co-parenting is tricky business, with or without a pandemic. There's constant shuffling of children from one house to the next all while trying not to unintentionally step on a landmine filled with your [...]